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Carolyn K. Bellis I first got in touch with my art as a healing process in my mid-twenties when I had psychotic breakdowns, diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic and was institutionalized for 8 years. While in the institutions, images from deep in my psyche flooded my mind ceaselessly. Drawing and painting them everyday cushioned the severity of my disease. As a result of my hallucinations, I have an infinite reservoir of images that I draw from when I paint. Today I still see visions when I close my eyes before sleep and when I meditate. I don't directly copy these for future paintings, but I'm sure they do influence the work I do. They are beautiful, awesome, and many times are like movies for they have action in them. In the institutions they were very frightening although when put on paper or canvas came out friendlier, almost childlike. Years ago my art kept my spirit alive. Today it gives me great peace. When I do my art I would like to tell you of that world: It's mysterious, strange, and almost foreign. If my paintings could talk to you they'd say: "Let's all start the play. Do you know your parts? OH! Just go nuts, dance, play wild symphonies. It's a mad musical. We are on stage for you and you and you. Learn to play by watching us. We are play. We are the sensual. We are you. We will haunt you, delight you, and mystify you with our performance. We are the magic. You are the magician." My art over the years has been my Mother: "I am your Mom and I love you. I have come here to protect you and give you peace. I am your light, I am your life, I am your pathway to sanity." please visit Carolyn K. Beliis website. ![]() |
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